Friday, July 22, 2011

What's so wrong with gloves?


I might be considered a softee but when it comes to the mess wing sauce makes I’ll put it on the line. Come to think of it I don’t need a 3rd degree burn to prove my manliness either. I used to be too ashamed to wear gloves when I ate, that was until I saw all my dry cleaning bills pile up.

Hold your horses, just think about this for a second. You guys can still start projects and not finish them, refuse to ask for directions, spend 10 hours watching football on Sundays and ignore your wife when she tells you to mow the lawn. Just stay away from rubber duckies or polkadots on your gloves and your masculinity will be safe and sound.

Now, well let’s just say I am considering it…

8 comments:

  1. I hadn't thought about wearing gloves when eating wings, but it makes sense. I know a lot of wing sauce cooks wear gloves when making them. Obviously, for the hygienic element, but to protect from Capsaicin burns, too!

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  2. I completely don't understand how wearing gloves when you eat reduces your dry cleaning bill.

    There are foods you eat with your fingers. Fingers get dirty. Depending on the situation you either lick them off or clean them on a towel. If that doesn't do the trick, you excuse yourself to wash your hands at the end of the meal.

    If you are rubbing your dirty fingers on your clothes, you are doing it wrong. And wearing gloves to eat messy foods is as wrong as pants on a trout.

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  3. Daniel, there's a strange and mysterious force known as gravity out there...sometimes it makes sauce drip down onto your clothes.

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  4. Joe, you being a slob and spilling on your shirt will still happen even if you have your gloves on. Also, no one can act like a "macho" man when eating with dainty white gloves.

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  5. Oh. I wasn't aware you were talking about gravity defying gloves. Well, now it makes perfect sense.

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  6. Joe, you're arrogant sarcasm is unnecessary. A real "average joe" would never even suggest eating wings with gloves. I think you've lost touch with the "common man" you claim to represent. Get real brother.

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  7. Yes, I bought the gloves at the Fantastic Four's yard sale. Also, I don't know about "dainty white" ones, but if Chuck Norris might be able to pull something off.

    And Steve, you wound me.

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  8. It's not going to stick. I dare you to take these gloves to Hooters and try them out. I'm sure Colonie PD will get called because you'll look creepy.

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